St. Patrick's Day Pub Brawl: Nadia Forde vs Laura Whitmore

St. Patrick's Day Irish Pub Brawl
Nadia Forde vs Laura Whitmore
(10-4, 10 KO vs 5-5, 5 KO)
Results: BBU; Story: Vassago

BEFORE: It's that time of the year again... Bow Lane pub in Dublin has been chosen as the host for the current edition of St. Patrick's Day Showdown with fan favorite Una Healy hosting the event in a very revealing green dress. There are many disappointed fans the shapely singer doesn't put her boxing talents but she vows to give other Irish girls a chance and Nadia Forde steps up to the challenge hoping to remind everyone she's a viable title contender in her own right. Over in the other corner we have Laura Whitmore covering for the blonde brigade but apparently Una Healy doesn't really want her to win as both women were seen trading insults at the bar few minutes before the BBU TV coverage started.

As usual in the Irish pub brawl rules it's unclear whether out contenstants are actually sober. The tables are moved to make space for our heroines who have agreed to fight in bare knuckles. Nadia came with the idea first and she owns a slight size advantage over the TV presenter. However Laura steals the last headlines when she grabs a pint and pours it over her breasts to swing over the neutral fans and make Una Healy blush as she conducts the introductions.

Nadia Forde wears a red T-shirt wrapped in a knot under the breasts & black jeans shorts. Long dark brown hair tied in a braid. Laura Whitmore wears a yellow T-shirt wrapped in a similar knot under the breasts & blue jeans shorts. Long blonde hair tied in a high ponytail. The fight is scheduled for ten rounds at 122 lbs catchweight.

Round 1:
Both women circle each other until the patrons' screams trigger an initial tangle and give Nadia the edge. She whacks Laura on the nose while the blonde jams her hand with an inaccurate swing and yields real estate as the brunette explodes with a high-octane pursuit. Laura gets backed by the wall and has to find a response any which way but Forde keeps piling more bare knuckle mayhem and cuts the blonde below the left eye that raises the cheerin volume. Whitmore yells out in anger and tries to charge forward but gets trapped in a headlock and Nadia takes her back to SLAM that blonde head off the bar and drop Laura on all fours! How are you doing? Patrons cheer even louder while Nadia pours more beer over the kneeling foe while Una Healy does start the count! Laura recovers from the head-busting moment at eight and takes a swing at Una before charging at the smiling brunette. Nadia slips by the wrestling tackle and swings more hooks upstairs but Laura escapes the heat and enjoys some help as a couple of boys pull Forde back at the bell.

Round 2:
Laura comes in hot and slams several crisp shots into Nadia's face but the Leinster native laughs off those efforts and scrams "You punch like a girl" at the blonde which fuels another short fuse blast. However Whitmore just can't land any big shot here and gets swamped by an overhand response that adds to her facial misery. Another lump appears under the left eye and glues Laura to the center of the pub before Forde loops a nasty hook on the left ear. Laura stumbles back onto the bar but dekes away from a jabbing charge and hangs around in mid-distance while Nadia taunts her to grow a pair. Laura regains her ambitions come the final minute but only lands a single crack into the brunette's face and gets blasted by a rare body series thereafter with the patrons separating the two hellcats at the bell upon order from Una Healy.

Round 3:
Everyone gets a drink before the third and Laura spills one over Una's cleavage before charging at Nadia... and she walks into a right hand that busts her nose into a blood-seeping mess! Uh-oh! Another hard right knocks the blonde's head back and sends her spinning onto the bar where she sinks on jelly knees and has Nadia thumping her with a left/right combo! Ugh! Laura slumps to her knees and has to take another count here! Una just doesn't appreciate the blonde's courage and issues a really fast count however Whitmore gathers her body to rise at nine and the Bow Lane patrons wants this contest to continue so we're up for more striking... Forde flies in with a left hook and adds another bloody cut under Laura's eye however she eats a stingy reply from the right as Whitmore has nothing to lose and powers on to land a couple of big shots and enjoys the last laugh when she clips the brunette's jaw and sends her stumbling onto the nearby table right at the bell.

Round 4:
Laura runs up the jabbing series early in the fourth but Nadia thumps her in the belly and tries to shove onto the bar only for the blonde to smack her with a nasty hook on the nose. Another big shot and the brunette starts leaking too which triggers a hectic back & forth tangle that even makes Una Healy lose her patience. Laura ends up clipping Nadia's chin one time too many and sends her tripping into the patrons who push her away just as Whitmore bangs a right hand on the nose and DROPS FORDE ON HER KNEES!!! Uh-oh! Another count here in the Pub Brawl and Laura takes a quick pint while Una issues an eight count... Nadia gets up and wipes the blood off her nose before charging at the TV presenter. Laura neutralizes her with another jabbing series and even lands a rare knee in the groin that sends Forde onto the tables but that actually works against the blonde who lets the allegedly ailing opponent to escape more genuine punishment. The bell interrupts Whitmore's chase and she's visibly upset that Nadia taunts the patrons into a louder ovation.

Round 5:
Blood spills early in the fifth again as this time Nadia jack hammers one rough shot into the blonde's face too many and bangs her in the boobs as well. She almost tears the beer-soaked yellow T-shirt in the process but Laura doesn't seem to mind a wardrobe malfunction at this stage and drives head-first into the brunette's chin. Nadia lets her slip through and lands a shot on the kidneys before measuring a wild uppercut on the jaw that sends Laura crashing onto the bar. Ugh! The legs go jelly and leave the blonde stranded just as Nadia fires a right hook on the eye that bursts a flesh stream of blood and DROPS WHITMORE ON HER BACKSIDE. Ugh! Nadia gets another beer during the count, drinks half of it and pours the rest over Laura's head as Una Healy doesn't mind it whatsoever either. This time there is no comeback for the fallen TV presenter who can no longer take this punishment and rolls onto her side with eyes closed while Una raises Nadia's arm in a winning gesture. KO5 Nadia Forde!!!

AFTER: Some patrons help Laura to get off the floor and she's escorted towards the restrooms while Una gives Nadia a long hug and hopes the Bow Lane is ready to provide drinks on the house since the shapely brunette definitely earned her honors tonight. Just don't tell last year's winner Maura Higgins that! Nadia doesn't mind posing for the selfies with literally everyone around and hopes Laura doesn't spend too much time in the restroom: "I bludgeoned that tramp but I'd still drink with her. It is what it is. She's not the best Irish boxer but she's less annoying than Vogue Williams! How is that bytch doing? One of these days I'm gonna challenge her into a true catchweight fight and wipe the floor with that arrogant slag!"

Meanwhile Una Healy argues that she would smash Maura Higgins into pieces herself and hopes to be back in the pub brawling business next year already: "It's not a case who's the best Irish boxer right now but because overall I'm the most accomplished Irish boxer ever! And that's the only thing that matters!" (winks).

Official Result: Nadia Forde def. Laura Whitmore KO5.